Wednesday, September 20, 2006

From the Home Offices In Raleigh, NC AND Detroit, MI...'s Top Ten Reasons Why Peter Karmanos Jr. Has Been Quiet About the Jack Johnson Crap!

10 - PK is hiding out with Osama and nobody can find him.
9 - Jimmy (Rutherford) has had PK's lips surgically sewn together.
8 - PK's still got his Stanley Cup Perma-*****-Eating-Grin on, and is totally oblivious to anything going on with the current team's injuries, etc...
7 - Pete's a University of Michigan fan, so he wins either way.
6 - PK's still got his Stanley Cup Perma-*****-Eating-Grin on, and doesn't remember drafting Jack Johnson.
5 - Pete went on a road trip with Willie Nelson's band this summer.
4 - The Tigers' imminent choke job in the American League Central means all the Detroit sports writers have something better to do.
3 - PK died wearing that Grin (see #6 and #8 ) , and CompuWare's been doing the Weekend-At-Bernie's thing with him at company meetings since June 19.
2 - Pure dumb luck (and we're all crossing our fingers)...

...and the number one thing that PK's silence regarding Jack Johnson is evidence of:

1 - The Islanders have been doing so many stupid things this off-season, the hockey press has been a little distracted!!!

Many, many thanks to StormChaserBH for posting the above list here. Ever considered writing for Letterman? His Top Tens have not had me busting my gut like that one did in well over ten years...

Current Music: "Are You All the Things?" by Bill Evans (Who, uncannily enough, looked kind of like John Forslund in his early 1960's photos. o_O)

BTW, to those of you lucky enough to be in the Triangle area this late afternoon/early evening, the Canes will be having their annual Red/White Scrimmage game at ye olde RBC Center. Attend if you can, and be sure to tell them "Large Marge...", er, "Stormbringer sent ya."! Eh-heh-heh-heh-heh!! ;D